Tanzania!!!

Myself and one of the teachers from my school were invited to attend an 8 day training in Dar es salaam, Tanzania for MTV SAF Grant to learn about capacity building. I was in Tanzania from Feb 5 to 16th. It was amazing! So much fun and I learned so much. The entire 8 days of work was basically to teach us all how to essentially run an NGO…which with my current career goals was perfect for me. I learned so much. It was led by an NGO, Restless Development from the UK to train us and they were awesome. They are going to continue to give us feedback and any help we need with our projects for the next 6 months which I great to. I met my MTV supervisors as well and they are very cool and laid back people. It was great to meet the faces behind the requirements and get to know them as actual people and not just funders.
The training was 5 modules: Strategic/operational Organizational planning, Monitoring & Evaluation, Media & Marketing, Financial Management, and Resource Mobilization & Partnerships. I learned so much and it was great cause its all stuff that will really help me in Grad School so that was a big added bonus. We had one day off and we spent the day on a beautiful island near Zanzibar off the coast of Tanzania just swimming in the ocean and lying on the beach. The ocean is gorgeous there. The kind of tropical ocean where its light turquoise and then fades to blue. So pretty. Most of the other grantees had never been in the ocean or even seen the ocean before so myself and a few of the other UK facilitators spent a good amount of time at the beach and in the hotel pool teaching others how to swim.
There were 8 other organizations there from Sierra Leone, Cameroon, Ghana, South Africa, Zimbabwe, Nigeria and Rwanda. The facilitators came from different places too because Restless Development HQ is in UK but has 11 other branches in the world. So the facilitators came from UK, Sierra Leone, Tanzania, Uganda, and Zambia. It was great to meet so many people from all over. These other grantees are absolutely amazing people. They are all in their early 20’s or mid 20’s and are so passionate and motivated to bring change to their countries no matter what. Two of the guys from Sierra Leone are fight for the rights of Lesbians, Gay, Bi-sexual and Transgender people in Sierra Leone where its very illegal to be any sexual orientation other then heterosexual. These guys are fighting to protect themselves and others and live free lives even though they have been threatened, beaten up, attacked, kicked out of places, etc… in Sierra Leone its so bad there that even if there is just a rumor that you might be gay or someone tells someone else, no proof at all, you can be kicked out of your home, university, job, etc… totally ostracized in your own country…yet these guys know they are right and are fighting. Its amazing!
There were other organizations just as inspirational. There are two organizations in Cameroon, 1 is fighting against child trafficking and the other is fighting for women’s rights, specifically to stop female genital Mutilation because it is still a very big practice there. There were medical students from Rwanda that are with an NGO that goes to military bases and teaches soldiers about HIV/AIDS prevention. In South Africa, it was two guys that have an NGO called Snapshot and they film documentaries all related to HIV/AIDS prevention and show them at schools and other events. In Nigeria, the Ngo is fighting for Muslim Women’s Rights and the other few from Ghana and Zim are just as amazing. Everyone is so intelligent and dedicated to their causes. It was so hopeful to see these young people that just came out of nowhere in the middle of these countries with so much strife against them and they are fighting to help everyone around them and risking their lives to do so. These are the people that keep me going. Even since I’ve been back I’ve had so many problems with the second meal and the grant and childish issues and I think of those people in Tanzania…if they can do it..i can do it. I’ve remained in touch with most of them even just in the last week. We really all became like a little family. There were only 18 of us, and like 26 or so with the facilitators and everyone got along so well and really cared about one another and how to network and help our one another’s causes. The facilitators said they have never seen a group bond so quickly together. Its was a wonderful experience.

More lessons: Camp Time

To continue on with lessons learned…the camp certainly turned out to be a few more. The teachers and myself had only two weeks to pull off the camp and to get all preparations done. Not much time at all. Things seemed to be going pretty well. The invitations to schools and teachers were all out and accounted for. We had made a budget for what we needed, gotten transport and had decided on the days we would go food shopping and get ourselves to the bank to withdraw the money needed for this event.
Things were going pretty well and depending on whom you speak to…the whole event went very well.
It started on Fri, Jan 28th and was going until Sun, Jan 30th. 8 schools total participated including mine. We had 30 youth participating, 2 out of school youth from my village and then 24 of my PACT Club members attended and were Peer Facilitators. So, overall we were in charge of about 64 youth and then when you add in the teachers from all the schools and guests from different Ministries and Organizations in Botswana… we had about 90 people in my tiny village of Metsibotlhoko.
The 7 other schools arrived on Friday afternoon where on arrival they decorated name tags for themselves (which let me just say stickers are amazing to kids here) and then just played football (soccer) and table tennis which we had two sets at the schools in storage so I took them out. Table tennis was a huge hit…kids here don’t get to play with kits or sets from a box…they make wire cars from scraps they find in the trash and make soccer balls out of many plastic bags. So, just those few things were a very big deal to them. They played for hours until dinner. Then we had a camp fire and the two other Peace Corps Volunteers that came to help me and facilitate a session each, were there for all of us to explain the magic of S’mores and all the kids got to make them. S’mores is a very American thing. I guess that makes sense…maybe…but I had no idea that no one knows. My friends in Europe don’t know either. Its American I guess… The kids were extremely excited to have chocolate and marshmallows and cookies. It was a nice surprise for them. A few of the boys from my school made the fire. Its second nature to them, they did it in total darkness and made the biggest bon fire I’ve ever seen. Kinda made me nervous but they had fun and spent the whole time telling me about how they do ancestral dances at the fire and wait for the purple smoke to come because that signifies something…not sure what exactly. They made the fire and while it was blazing, one of the boys from my school who might I add was conducting the camp fire in the pitch black night wearing sunglasses that he had found from my garbage that broke almost a year ago that he found an has kept and fixed ever since and then declared to everyone that we should all say a prayer for me. I was really confused and asked him why we were praying for me. He said they were going to pray for me that I don’t leave Metsi and that I get them more S’mores…the kids got priorities. It was sweet…kinda weird…but sweet.
I got home around 11pm after everything finished. Went to bed by 12pm and woke up at 5am to get back to school to start preparing breakfast with the teachers and sorting out all details for the day. The teachers from my school were all in charge of cooking for the event and kind of designated themselves for that which was fine with me and I appreciate there hard work on the cooking. However, the entire even from start to finish to even most of the preparations beforehand…were all done by me. It was personally very disappointing for me. The idea of this project being sustainable is slim to none and its hard to really let that sink in. I have to accept that I have done all I can and worked as hard as possible to make sure everything has been successful, which the actual grant itself is very successful. Its just that my expectations didn’t live up to reality…which that’s usually the case in life so its ok. Its sad really that when it comes down to it is in a way because of the success that things that people have lost their motivation. Ever since our school and staff has gotten so much praise for the grant and our being ranked this year 3rd out of 89 primary schools in the region people have all gotten very swollen heads and full of themselves…losing sight of what this is really all about…the kids. When there is no sight there is no work and this is just being more and more proven the more praise we get. It’s a catch 22. I want us to be successful but the culture hasn’t taught anyone how to deal with positive reinforcement so the more successful we get the more pointless it becomes as far as the teachers go. Its sad really.

Mozambique!

December was a hard. It was a trying time for me in my life and Peace Corps Service. Lots of looking into the future, looking into the past, dealing with new events, and even dealing with past events that can come to bite you later. BUT I’m good and I’ve learned even more than I thought and dealing pretty well and deal pretty well if I do say so myself…which I do!
To start with I spent most of my December break (since school is closed from November 26-January 11…yeah, gotta love the year long school system) working on/writing/stressing about my grad school applications. I applied to 3 schools only, while I have many and I mean many friends here in PC with me all applying to 10 and the law school people…20…I can’t even imagine, but with law school they do have the luxury of using a system where you basically click a button and apply to another school…not so much with grad school. Everything is unique for every school. Each essay is different and wants different things. Some schools require you mail in certain parts of your apps while other school allow you to do it online. Being in Botswana and having no ability to use internet, post office or too much airtime on my phone for that matter without leaving the village and traveling for 4 hours to get 80K…I have a whole new respect for being allowed to just email everything in! I love those schools…lucky for me…I didn’t really apply to any of those. A life lesson I learned…I’m the connoisseur of self punishment.
I’ve been working on the Grad School process since around September of last year and knew that 2/3 schools deadlines were January 15 and the other was February 15. So, I immediately started doing everything I needed to. Contacting academic and professional references, contacting my undergrad university to get transcripts mailed, starting looking at all the essay but were way too intimidated by them to start that yet, but I did start stressing about it of course so that should count as work, etc… I was thinking about it all the time and trying to get things , mailed from Botswana, getting people in the USA to mail things for me, get recommenders to mail in things, doing online applications every time I had internet whether it was in a nice restaurant with WIFI or a greasy, sketchy internet café that totally rips me off yet a deadline is a deadline so I had to do it. Things were going well and I had about 10 days til Jan 15 until I started getting emails from schools saying, “we don’t have your transcripts” or “we’re missing one of your recommendation letters.” AND to top it all off I get a notice from the school that informed me their deadline was Feb 15 that, Oh no, just kidding…we’ve moved it to Jan 18….which at that point was about 9 days away. Needless to say there were a few tears dropped in that sketchy internet café that rips me off. I had spent all my time focusing on the other 2 schools I knew were due in Jan and was going to spend Jan finishing the what I thought was Feb deadline. So I now had 9 days to write a 2 page essay on why I should be at their school, which was fine, but also a 8-12 page research paper on humanities/international affairs as well as get the app finished an make sure all necessary parts to the app were in. fun stuff!
So, I went back to my village and sat up at the outlet in the dining hall of my school for two days to somehow bang out a 10 page research paper on HIV/AIDS in Botswana. Not much of a stretch, but write about what you know right. Well, I did. I finished everything with the help of everyone around me editing my writing and being camped out for 2 days at one of my friends house who happens to have internet in her home…yeah, life is not always fair. Another lesson…but I actually really did know that one. We’ll see what happens. I applied to only 3 schools because I only really liked these 3 programs that are all some version or another of International Development and I just figured if I’m going to be broke for the rest of my life from student loans then I need to like the school I go to. If I’m spending that much money on school, then I’m not going to one I kinda want or a back up school. I’d rather wait and apply again the next year, as much as that thought makes my soul slowly die. So, no back up schools were applied to…we’ll see…
I did get a break in December though which was amazing. I went with 3 other PCV’s to Mozambique for what was suppose to be 7 days, but ended up being 10 days. It was beautiful. So wonderful there. It was such a great trip. We spent 2 days in the Capital, Maputo and then 4 more days in Tofo which is a gorgeous area about a 7 hour drive north of the capital. Mozambique is right on the ocean so we spent all of our time in Tofo just sitting on the beach, reading, walking around, eating good food an just hanging out. So relaxing which with the two major “G’s” in my life (Grad school & Grant) I really needed to relax. Maputo was amazing. So cool and lively. Real African markets and just great people and things to do. We walked all over and went to a different place to eat almost every meal. It was so great to get out of Botswana and see a new place and especially the water. Going from literally living on an Island my whole life to being land locked for 2 years…its weird! I didn’t realize how much I love the water. We had the best time and despite our last day, I still stand by the fact that it was a good trip.
On our last Day in Mozambique, we were still in Tofo and we were planning to leave on the 4am bus the next morning to start heading back to Botswana to get back in time for the Christmas Eve dinner that about 40 PCV’s were going o in gabs. Our last day was the 21st of December and all our bus tickets were set and ready for us to leave on the 22nd. It was our last afternoon and my 3 friends just wanted to sit and read all day and then we planned to go out to dinner that night in town, the small little town with a bunch of tourist stuff and restaurants that night, but I was restless and wanted to go for a walk. So, I did. We had been told by everyone, the backpackers place staff, the locals, the staff at restaurants, everyone how save this place was. It was a big tourist area and the majority of the population at all times were tourists. So, I went for a walk into town which is about a 30 minute walk on the beach and I went alone since no one else wanted to go. I went o town and walked around a little at the markets and then started to head back to the lodge we were staying at. A lot of people on the beach that I passed by and waved to since it was 2pm on the beautiful sunny day and I was about another 4 min walk back to the lodge until there was a arm around my neck from a man standing behind me. He pulled me to the ground and kept choking me while another man came running down from over a hill to take my bag and everything in it.
Its funny, you never can really understand how you might react in that situation. You can be as prepared as you want but you have to summon your knowledge of what you know or what you think you know is best to do that. You have to specifically focus your mind to react how you want to. You can’t know til your in the middle of it. So, as I was lying there on the beach with the water crashing up against me, the man kept choking me while his friend or accomplice or whatever was stealing everything I had…Ipod, camera, passport, all money, all ID’s, all bank cards, etc… I didn’t even know I had half those things in there, but apparently I did. So as his arm first went around my neck, my thoughts immediately went to a stir of crazy and disoriented thoughts. I had to literally tell my mind to shut up, which I did. Then my mind went to visuals of them killing me in different and various ways. I had to tell me mind to stop that. Then, I finally thought…”Do I fight back? Do I try?” I calmed my mind and thought assessed. One man was still choking me and had me pinned to the ground but was behind me, the other could barely make eye contact with me he seemed so ashamed and I realized I never saw a weapon. I didn’t see anything on them but I knew that didn’t mean it wasn’t possibly there. I just started to scream at them, “Take it! Take it all. Just take it.” I wanted it known that I wasn’t going to fight. I wasn’t going to be prideful or think I could win this situation in hopes that then if they were going to fight with me, maybe now they wouldn’t knowing I didn’t care about my things. The man that couldn’t make eye contact looked at me for a second or two in shock and kinda like he couldn’t understand why I was just giving it to them. Then, for me, my plan was to not fight in less they started to. I wasn’t gonna be the one to instigate anything because I felt that it was my best chance to be freed. I worried that if I fought with them then they would fight with me and we all knew in that situation that I would lose that fight.
His whole awful event only really lasted for about 20 seconds but it felt like days. I could barely breathe from being choked and just kept reciting in my head over and over how much I was hoping they wouldn’t do to me all the horrific things I was thinking. Finally, the man gathering my things got it all and ran back up the hill. The other man continued to choke me to give his the other one a head start or just for good measure or something…I don’t know. The one choking me gave me one last big squeeze on my neck and pushed me harder in to the ground and then finally ran off. I was free. I could go. They were both running up the hill. I stood up in the biggest panic attack of my life and barely breathing and ran as fast as I could back to the lodge I was staying at. I got back and one of my friends was on the beach, she had been walking alone on the other side of the lodge by herself taking pictures with her big fancy camera of the water….it could have just as easily been her. Wrong place at the wrong time I guess.
She looked at me and couldn’t tell from far away but saw me coming so she waited at the bottom of the steps. As I got closer I could see her face drop and her eyes fill with fear. She took me up stairs and ran to the front desk. Told them I was just mugged. The 3 guys at the front desk and the cook from the back all ran out and down the beach trying to go grab the guys that did this to me. Everyone around, all the other guests were buying me bottled water and cokes…they just kept coming. I think I had a sip of one maybe. My friends sat there hugging me while I was trying to catch my breath and they insisted I go take take a shower and get all the sand off me. They stayed with me while I showered cause I was too freaked out to be alone. I then spent the next 3 days just trying to get out of the country.
The owner of the lodge was very nice and took great care of me. Less than an hour after it happened I was coming back from the shower and the owner said the police who by the way aren’t allowed cars…yeah… found two guys and they think they are the guys that attacked me. I was still shaking like a leaf and had red marks on my throat and myself, one of my friends, the lodge owner and an employee to help translate Portuguese all got in his truck and drove to the police station for my “line up.” I walked in the room and there were about 7 police men just standing in the room, some cleaning and some playing with there AK 47 guns. It’s a creepy sight. They all started in the with Portuguese and I just sat there trying not to feel numb cause that’s all I was feeling…or not feeling I guess. Next thing I knew there were two men in hand cuffs literally 1 foot away from me and one on holding on to them or straining them or anything. This was my “line up.” They stood next to me and then asked if these were the men. I told everyone that I didn’t see the mens faces very well but since I have a photographic memory I could give them exact details of what the men were wearing and outlines of there face, but I obviously never looked them in the eye either. I didn’t think these guys were them from what I remembered but I did keep visualizing them choking me even with the hand cuffs. So, that was slightly traumatic. My friend was outside calling PC in Botswana and trying to get them to help us. They contacted PC Mozambique and they were great. They helped me every step of the way. I spent 2 hours in the police station in Tofo answering questions and giving them the details of what happened and what was stolen and the cost and everything. They informed me that obviously I was not going back to Bots the next day. In Mozambique you can be arrested in the country for just traveling around and not having your passport on hand and especially the visa we had to be there. So needless to say getting back to Bots or even leaving at all was not possible without a visa and passport. PC Bots allowed one of my friends to stay with me since I was pretty shaken up and had no idea what to do.
So, 2 of my friends left the next morning at 4am as was our original plan while Sonia and I stayed to deal with everything. Sonia and I left at 6am to go to the Prosecutors Office in the next town an hour away. We spent 7 hours there! All we needed was a report stamped by the High Commissioner that stated my passport was stolen to that the embassy could give me a new one in the capital in Maputo. We sat there surround by other frustrated and kinda interesting people for about 3 hours while no one would talk to us and no one did anything. Nothing! Finally they took me in the back and we spent almost 2 hours while they typed up the exact report the police from Tofo already wrote….but they typed it and made me tell the exact same thing all over again. In the middle of explaining the choking, the police officer that was translating the one typing, on the biggest old fashioned type writer I have ever seen. Seriously, no joke. This thing was the first type writer ever invented. Unreal. Anways, the man stopped me for a minute to ask me if I was single. I said yes thinking it was something they had to put on my report which the Tofo police asked me to for the report, they then giggled when I said yes, but I let it slide. This guy not only laughed, then smiled and then told me he was in love with me and we should marry. I’m pretty used to that at this point, it happens a lot but this time I couldn’t deal with the unprofessionalism and threatened to walk out and tell Obama (cause everyone thinks that people in American just know him) if he didn’t stop harassing me while I was talking about being physically assaulted. That seemed to work!
We finished and the man had the typed report. Meanwhile I could here Sonia in the lobby area o I guess more like the bare room in the front we had been in all morning and she was telling a few guys my story. I laughed. I didn’t care. One man in particular was very nice and was interested but only spoke some English. He understood the main parts but that was it. So we continued our search for the last person we needed. All we needed was the High Commissioner to stamp. We were told he wasn’t there but the Deputy could sign it. We spent the next two hours getting PC Moz on the phone to speak Portuguese to the police for us over and over to try to get this all done. Still nothing, Everyone kept saying the Commissioner wasn’t there and neither was the Deputy. After almost 7 hours we found the Deputy and he told us he couldn’t sign it, he didn’t have the authority. BUT he did point over to the nice man that spoke little English and Sonia was telling the story to and said he could do it. This man had been sitting there all day next to us. We both thought the Deputy was messing with us. We got even more annoyed and explained how we were trying to just get to Maputo so we could go home and he needed to help us. Our sob story so to speak. The deputy said, “yeah, I know. Talk to him…he’s the High Commissioner.”
Our jaws dropped to the floor! We had been talking to him all day…we had no idea. No one told us. Everyone kept lying and saying he wasn’t here. 7 HOURS!!! He smiled and signed the paper.
It was too late to get to Maputo then so we had to stay the night in that other town still about 6 hours from Maputo. We took the 4am bus out the next morning and got to the US Embassy in Maputo around 11am. We met up with the PC Moz staff and they hooked everything up. After several hours and getting stuck in traffic since it was Dec 23rd now and Christmas was getting closer and doing a bunch of paperwork and waiting. Finally about 245pm I got my new passport. As I collected it from the guy he said, “Stay out of trouble. I hope you come back to Moz despite what happened. Good luck with PC and good luck getting your visa.” What? No one said anything about another visa. I mean, yes, it makes sense, but I figured since no one mentioned it all day there was a loop hole or something. I don’t know anything about Visas and what not. Nope, everything in moz was closing at 330pm b/c of the holiday and would be closed til the 27th…I had 45 mins to get a visa or stay here til the 27th.
We called PC Moz and said, “So, visa???” all I heard on the phone was silence and then, “DAMN!” Click! 10 mins later another PC staff member pulls up and says so we all forgot you needed a visa I guess. Lets o try to fix this in 30 mins. This man was a god. He pulled some strings and he did fix it. I have no idea how. He got some people to agree to make my visa the next morning and then Sonia and I would take the overnight bus on Christmas Eve back to Johannesburg, SA and then catch the 5 hour bus ride back to Gabs, BW to get to Botswana on Christmas afternoon. BUT he did it and immigration finished my visa on Christmas Eve at about noon. Sonia and I walked around and ate more good food to then catch out bus at 7pm. Got to Joburg at 5am and arrived in gabs at 1pm. More days in Mozambique and lots of stress but it was so good to have Sonia with me she kept me calm and somewhat sane. So, quite the trip. I realized that I’m not as invincible as I once thought I was. I think we all live our lives at least a little bit thinking that the bad things won’t ever happen to you. I think people have to or else you’d live in fear all the time, but I had the first hand realization that eventually you have to take part in statistics. Its bound to happen sometime and honestly with all the international travel I do and the types I do and will do…it really was bound to happen eventually. I just hope my number is up and I don’t have to do it again, but I’ll deal if I do and I’ll learn some self defense moves in the mean time…just in case.
So, now, in January. We are busy. School started and we are having the PACT Youth Cam for the grant Jan 28-30 in my village with about 41 kids coming and 15 teachers. We’re having children and teachers form all 8 schools come that we trained at the Facilitators Workshop back in November. 8 Schools is a lot to take on but the teachers want to and all the schools called us asking to be apart of it…so ther we go. Hoping for the best! Planning like crazy now. We will have once again planned this whole thing in 2 weeks time. Insane!
After that Tanzania! Myself and one the teachers at my school is attending an 8 day training/workshop put together by the grant (SAF) and an NGO called Restless Development based in the UK about Organizational strategy, Monitoring & Evaluation and a bunch of other business stuff I don’t know about but will I guess…also, they haven’t told me what else its about. I’ll be in Tanzania from February 5-16th. I’m excited and a little nervous actually. It’s my first big, all expenses paid business trip. I feel very grown up and kinda weird. I can say already that my plan is not to be mugged on the beach in Tanzania….I’m making that my prerogative.
I have 5 more months left in Botswana. I’m so excited to come home. I found out finally from PC they will not let us come home until June 17th b/c that will make it exactly 2 full years living in my village and 26 months in Botswana Peace Corps…so I’ll be home around then. Yay!